Muskrat Droppings #2
Our Chance to Poop Back!
Everyone, Report to Elon—STAT!!!
Yesterday, Elon Musk sent out a memo to every federal employee telling them that they needed to report five things they accomplished last week Some of the emails were sent to people sent home by Musk on administrative leave. So, I guess they reported, “Waiting to hear whether I have been fired.”
What did you do last week?
This message was sent with high importance. Please reply to this email with approx. five bullets of what you accomplished last week and cc your manager. Please do not send any classified information, links, or attachments. Deadline is this Monday at 11: 59pmEST.
American Citizens, this is your BIG CHANCE!
You can help Decrease Government Efficiency (D*GE) by responding to this email. Please let the Muskrat know what you did last week. But DO NOT, under any circumstances send classified information OR classified links OR classified attachments.
5,000,000 lengthy reports would be just great!
Email immediately: hr4@opm.gov
Glorious Update: The Trump administration just informed the nation (3 PM ET, 2/24/2025) that they will drop this email project and none of the replies will be used for any purpose.
My own contribution:
Another fine example.
Or this:
My favorite:
You can do it! Pretend you're writing a few choice words to George III.
1. Wrote to my congressman to complain about an unelected billionaire drug addict and his illegal hackers gaining access to government accounts and acting as if they’re in charge
2. Volunteered at a food bank because I care about people
3. Read posts on Substack about The Resistance to fascism
4. Looked at my budget, trying to reduce expenses because my only income is Social Security
5. Printed out the list of all the companies that support Project 2025 so I can be sure to boycott them
When I was working, when your boss started asking for a list of items you accomplished daily or weekly, you knew they were wanting to make changes (usually outsource) and probably fire someone. Most jobs don't really have a list. Support jobs for example - I took another support call.
In any event, it really became an exercise in creative writing to not get fired. The actual value of learning what was really accomplished was nil. But it definable added to the stress level.
Thanks for the humor.